Thursday, January 22, 2009


I loves me some cookies. If there's one thing veganism really has going for it, besides hippies, it's cookies. People will bitch and moan about the ass-like properties of most people's tofu scramble, or how some people's cupcakes taste like scabs, but vegan cookies, almost across the board, are Hawaii Fab-O.

Take for example Sticky Finger's Bakery. It's basically an animal product-free shitake hole (that's insultingly overpriced), but their lemon coconut cookies are to-die-for (the chocolate chip are fine, too, but the oatmeal cookies are way too sweet). Cookies were born to shun the exploitation and commodification of our cow and chicken brethren.

Most hip vegans think Isa Chandra Moskowitz's cookies are the gold standard, but unfortunately this is not true. I don't understand why or how because she did, after all, write the Cupcake Bible, which truly is a masterpiece that will stand the test of time and the stupid hipster fad that is cupcakes. For some reason, some of her cookie recipes suck. And not in a good way.

Personally, I am drawn to cookies that are slightly crunchy on the outside, with a center that is chewy and has some bite. Like my men. A cookie can't be vomit-sweet, either, or cause you to feel dizzy or nauseated if you eat more than three. Also, like my men. And if you are baking vegan cookies yourself, well, then, of course you are going to eat more than three, so this is uber important.

The vegan cookie expert is Dreena Burton, of Eat, Drink, Be Vegan fame. If you don't believe me, try her chocolate chip cookie recipe. Just this past weekend, I made her spelt flour-based "You Dipped Chocolate in My Peanut Butter Cookies," which are rich and decadent and completely amazing. Plus, you can pretend that the spelt flour makes them good for you (think fiber)!

Vegans always moan on and on about greenhouse gases, animal suffering, drowning polar bears, blah-blah-vegan-blah-go-vegan-vegan-blah-blah, without pulling out the biggest gun of them all: never underestimate the power of a good cookie.

7 comments:

Marky Mae Brown said...

Yay! I love cookies.

Marky Mae Brown said...

I think you were posting this "anti-vegan-whining" post at the exact same time I was posting some "vegan whining." You're right, though; I'm sick of thinking about shit that bums me out. Cookies are much better to think about.

Dimples Doublefist said...

...and kittens and puppies.

Dimples Doublefist said...

Oh, and I live for your whining, so don't take that as a personal insult.

Marky Mae Brown said...

Well thank you.

Brainsugar said...

These cookies sound - dare I use an overused and lavender word - FIERCE! I wants me some right now!

troy said...

yummo... always been pretty hot on the good ol' Boston Cookies meself.